In the books it says I'm studying Physics right now.

Yeah. Not gonna happen.

Have this song in memory of not studying

No Rain by Blind Melon

Today I did a lot of things over again.

I loaded about three hundred songs on my computer from my brother's hard drive.
It didn't work. So I did it again.

I drove into town to bring him home.
Then I drove back again.

I screwed things up that were quite alright.
Then made a joke to diffuse things.

But I only changed my pants once.
Which is quite amazing.
Because I change my pants a lot.



The Next Day...

I drove my sister to the airport.
Then drove back home.

I drove my brother to meet some people.
They didn't show up.
I drove back to pick him up.

I loaded the unworking music on my computer.
Only half of it worked.

My sister's flight was cancelled.
Her phone broke.
I drove to the airport.
I waited outside the airport.
I drove around in circles.
I asked a guy to go get her for me.
We tried to find the cell phone parking lot.
We tried to find his mom.
By the time we found it,
She'd already left.
But we had to take another loop.
Then I drove home.
In the dark.
In the rain.
My sister hit her head on the trunk.

That was today.

Today something strange,
no, different,
happened.

I felt different
for just a moment

the air in my lungs was lighter
the backs of my eyes were a different color
and cold fell off my skin

it was yellow
and it was fall
then it was gone





While this happened I was driving the 4.5 mile intro to "I will posses your heart" by Death Cab for Cutie

Sometimes talking to you feels like swimming through jello.
I want to say something.
I want you to laugh.
I want to respond witty and quick.
I want other people to think we're having fun.
but my brain feels like sludge.


A great song
Radical Face - Glory

we grow old
and creak and groan
ancient limbs
knobby joints
weary roots
curved spines

the angels that stroke our vocal chords
get bored and walk away
to new voices
the angels that used to sit at our feet
stop kissing your cheek
and walk out the door

because the wind
that shakes the trees
rattles your bones,
sit in your chair
place a peppermint
on your tongue
and look at the beige wall

the woman down the hall
hums a tune you've forgotten

I want to post something but I can't think of anything to write.
So here's something from creative writing, how about a haiku:

Olive trees are blue
why then, Crayola, do you
make those crayons green?

As the cold creeps in
the oldest tree trunks creak
like arthritis

like powdered eyelids
in a lazy blue blanket
sails are rocking chairs

As much as I would shout otherwise, I am quite like the Compson brothers from The Sound and the Fury. The one by Faulkner.

Like Jason I am selfish and demanding, holding myself to a standard that makes no sense. Like Benjy my thoughts are incomplete, dropping off at the slightest distraction. Like Quentin’s thoughts, mine can be dark and foreboding.

But maybe I can love like Benjy. Or maybe see the beauty in every ounce of brokenness, like Quentin. And perhaps I can have as little as possible in common with Jason. That guy is a jerk.

Maybe I can be good, if I try. Like they didn’t.

You know those things that just define you?
I've found one.

You've probably heard this before, you know. The irony that people use the works of other's to define their own individuality.

Well I don't care, this song rocks.

Mistress by Sufjan Stevens

I realized something.